Meeting Miss Perfection
by MidnightSakuraBlossom and SYD
Summary: Parody of Mary Sues - Death Note style! What would happen if Light encountered a Mary Sue when discovering the Death Note instead of Ryuk? Find out in this totally epic story of love, drama, and possible dry humor!


**So me and my boyfriend (and some other friends, mind you perverts) took a trip to another state recently and were in a Walmart...somehow, I got the idea to write Death Note Mary Sue parody after looking at some outrageous clothing in the place. Yeah.**

**There is absolutely no reason to take this one-shot seriously, it's total crap but I hope that at least someone gets even the slightest chuckle out of it. LOL. Read all the way to the end for a surprise narrator reveal.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note, and I am very ashamed to say that I came up with the character and overall appearance of this OC I am using. *Shrinks into the darkest corner in mortification***

**.**

**.**

**.**

Title: Meeting Miss Perfection

Written By: MidnightSakuraBlossom

WARNINGS: A very stupid intentional parody sue, abuse of poetic terms and descriptions, fail angst, sparkle overload, language, mentioned sexual intercourse, and no doubt bad writing

MAY CAUSE: Screams of terror, eye rolling, hate, gagging, a paranoid fear of sparkles, and the awareness of how ridiculous Mary Sues are

**.**

**.**

**.**

It was a very stormy day in some irrelevant part of Japan, or Vietnam. Or...some place in Asia...wait, no, there's some Kanji on that sign so it's probably Japan...

Well, either way, it was raining so hard that people were struggling to see through it. They could barely walk without clinging to their coats and umbrellas for life. Darkness filled the sky and the rain was impossibly thick. Did we mention already that it was very stormy this afternoon and there were so many ways to describe that?

Somewhere at a school was a young man by the name of Light Yagami. Brilliant guy, he was very smart and analyzed literally everything through and through. He excelled with his studies and hoped to get into one of the best colleges imaginable. And only was he way up on the intellectual charts, his looks were very distracting and there were tons of horny girls that wanted nothing more than to be his girl. It's too bad that he didn't give a fuck about any of them, both literally and figuratively.

Light was just sitting in class gazing out the window as usual. He was quite bored actually. Yeah, because this was before he discovered the Death Note and he was still a decent guy. As girls secretly ogled him from a distance, he shifted his hand around on his cheek as he absentmindedly gazed out and released a low sigh.

_I just want some kind of excitement in my life. Day after day, it's the same routine of vicious hatred with man vs man. Kind of angsty, really. _Light brushed a falling strand of hair back in place and then tore his eyes from the window a moment to take a careless glance at his unsuspecting classmates and teacher. _Maybe one of these days, a piece of heaven will fall into my hands and give me the power to rule over all these weak bitches, but time will tell. And why...why do I have the strangest sense that someone is watching me from a different world?_

**.**

**.**

**.**

We now move into the Shinigami realm. A place neither Heaven or hell. A place in which the gods of death, or Shinigami for you technical folks, hung out and did literally nothing all day. These beings had the ability to see what happens with the humans and had these freaky Death Notes which were notebooks that possessed the power to kill people.

Very depressing, yes?

A sexy figure walked across the barren wasteland of the world and stopped until it could see through over into the human realm. A curious expression passed over the extremely sexy figure's perfect heart-shaped face, adding to her sex appeal and the sparkles radiating off of her for no true reason at all but to add to her perfection glittered blindingly.

She, all in all, looked a bit out of place in this world. Everything else was gloomy and overall depressing. Her presence made it all lighten up and all the other Shinigami who dared to look her way were instantly caught under her wonderful charm that no one less had ever had.

Her body was a mysterious, bold gray shade and absolutely perfect and smooth with it's lack of any body hair, dryness, scars, or anything else that would be a turn off. She was tall, her curves almost never ending and giving her a sexy, womanly appearance. With perky, luxurious big breasts that no simple bra could ever hold in, long and slender legs soft to the touch, and not one physical turn off, it was no wonder why she was the most sought-after female in this realm. And we haven't even gotten to her jet-straight ankle-length raven hair that waved in the slightest breeze and sparkled for no true or realistic reason that was always decorated with skull decorations and giving her a bit of a Gothic look that didn't even ward off religious people.

Her eyes: they turned every color in the spectrum, and they sparkled when she was in a good mood with was, in fact, about ninety-nine percent of the time. They were decorated with heavy black makeup that matched well with her flowing hair that constantly stayed in perfection, and they were narrowed a bit, giving her one hell of a sexy expression constantly and could give anyone an orgasm at the most random times. Her eyelashes were her most noteworthy feature, however: they were very long and in place all the time, sharpening her aforementioned gaze even more!

Her clothing choice was very well-thought out and everyone loved her sense of style. She could rival that of some of the most talented big-shots in the human realm! She tended to wear a very tight black corset with all the usual features: an open back with only a few pieces of material to band it together, basically no covering over her bouncy, perky, all in all wonderfully-developed breasts, and some sparkles on that. She also wore a very, very shamelessly short purple skirt that hardly reached her thighs. Honestly, it could have been classified as underwear rather than outer clothing. It was black with a gray belt with skull patterns on it, it clasped nicely around her tiny little waist that showed off her sexy hips. Did we mention that her hips swayed sexily when she walked? If not, gasp! Anyway, anyway, she was so shameless about exposing herself that she refused to cover her perfectly-toned legs. She wore purple heels probably ten inches off the ground, and they sparkled distractingly in the right light.

As this figure gazed into the human world, she brushed back her silky, wonderful back locks to reveal her purple, looped earrings that, yes, sparkled like there was no tomorrow. It should be noted that for a Shinigami, she didn't look as...ahem, inhuman as they did. Her appearance was very much humanoid, maybe, her dark gray skin being the only thing to make one doubtful.

"Hmm...there seems to be a class of some sort going on in this Japanese school. I would know, I never get the wrong idea of a situation and am always spot on after all." The figure smiled sexily to herself as she laid her eyes on one particular human boy; a brunette one with the most fantastic chocolate eyes she had ever seen. Like that out of a very cheesy and poorly-written story, a warm feeling that was once lost welled up in her chest which, in fact, still bounced and was flaunted as she swayed back and forth and caught the attention of random Shinigami passing by, and her eyes widened in surprise.

She was in love with the guy she just knew with not doubt whatsoever was the guy of her dreams! In a grand total of five seconds! In this beautiful, magnificent, perfect female creature's mind was sparkly mental pictures of him and this boy going on dates in the human realm, making out in an impromptu manner and being able to seduce him into sexual intercourse with ease, and basically having the most wonderful fairytail ending that she deserved because she was the most sparkly, sexy, smart, powerful, witty, curvy, sensitive, daring, bold, sophisticated, talented, busty, creative, friendly, and passionate female to ever live in both realms! And, alas, she too had a horrible back story that has still shaken her to this day!

"Radiance!" The beautiful creature turned around at the sound of a familiar voice, her ever-changing sparkled eyes glittered magnificently in the darkness, her sexy and impossible-to-ignore breasts bounced in the most alluring manner, and the last tiny sparkle that radiated off of her – true to her name – fell onto her left eye and caused a tear to trickle down her pretty face with perfection to give her a sensitive appearance at the point in time. "What are you doing looking into the human realm?"

Another shinigami flew towards her, his flowing wings flapped and stirred up a small wind which aided perfectly in making Radiance's hair flow to perfection and kicked up some of her sparkles once again which added to her appeal in a manner you would not believe.

"Ryuk!" Radiance gasped very discreetly due to her beautiful, womanly voice that well-matched her lovely appearance even though she was ever-lastingly young and had the appearance of a fifteen year old with way too much sex appeal for her age. She carefully hid the black notebook of death behind her back, Ryuk didn't even get the slightest glimpse because she was also a master at hiding things in the most simplest places. "I-I was just gazing around because I was bored; just like everyone else here."

Because of Radiance's amazing powers of persuasion, she was ultimately successful in convincing Ryuk she was just gazing around because she was bored and not because she was developing a very superficial crush on a guy she hardly knew at all. Maybe it was just because this boy looked so alluring with his chocolate brown eyes that matched his perfectly-styled hair, his sharp gaze, how flattering that shirt was on his chest. Radiance didn't know, which was a huge surprise.

Because Radiance was so perfect that she knew everything single detail about everyone and everything! BUT! This boy was such a mystery still in the dark, a valuable and sought-after gem waiting to be unearthed from the shadows! He was...he was HOT.

"Tell me, Ryuk," Radiance leaned forward, teasingly pushing her breasts closer so that they would bounce in that same appealing manner they always did. She noticed Ryuk was looking there, and she just knew that she had him wrapped around her little finger now. Just like all of the other males around here. And even the females. STRAIGHT females. "If I were to drop one of my Death Notes into the human realm...and that hot brown-haired student over there picked it up...this would make his Shinigami, correct?"

"Yeah, you would be his." Ryuk answered simply. He still wasn't really looking at the ridiculously humanoid Shinigami's face, for his gaze was forever locked on her breasts. "Still, someone else could touch one of the Death Notes as well, and you would just have to suck it up and go with him or her."

"Hmm...are you QUESTIONING my implied dirty plot?" Perfectly, they swayed and sparkled for no apparent reason. Ryuk lost in their trance forever. The poor, poor Shinigami. "Let me just come out right now with it! For you will have asked that anyway, because everyone loves me and always asks what I am currently doing! Okay, that guy is being stalked by me...I think I may be in love with him. I've been watching him for ONE MINUTE. I know my heart is about to burst from my chest if another shall come to pass."

Oh yes, something was definitely going to burst; but that something was certainly not her HEART...

Radiance turned back to the view of the human realm, Ryuk was brought out of his trance as soon as he noticed. And he wiped a trail of blood down his mouth he briefly wondered how that had gotten there. But we all know why.

"I want to...proclaim my love to him." Radiance sighed dreamily and the colors in her wonderful eyes danced and mingled in together, the sparkly mess of sparkles shimmering about her whole perfect form. She was no doubt in love over the span of one ENTIRE MINUTE. "'Twas not a coincidence that I met those chocolate brown eyes, 'twas not a random decision for my heart to be sold to him entirely. We shall meet now: I will throw one of the several Death Notes I have inside of my hidden inventory and he shall touch it with his flawless hands. I will be his partner, by his side forever and ever. We will always have love-"

"Why are you telling me your plan?" Ryuk pointed out, and it was a good thing that he did. Because Radiance's wonderful and emotional love proclamation was getting on the nerves of the author. Sorry about breaking the forth wall, but it was totally called for.

Radiance gasped in her perfect way, not too dramatic and not too forced. It was all in all, magnificent, just like her womanly figure and glimmering eyes that resembled endless pools of the color spectrum of the world. Which never failed to have any male drooling and nosebleeding at her sparkly, very ridiculously pretty and high heels that added to the overall masterpiece that was Radiance!

"How dare you question me! I am Lady Radiance-Sakura-Kokoro-Shimmerson-Elizabeth-Paris-Liberty-Hottie-Desiree-Magnificence-Majesty-Grace!" Radiance, of course, towered over poor Ryuk near scaring him to death with her wonderfully evil expression that she could easily pull when needing to intimidate. That was never thing about her that made Miss Lady-Sakura-Kokoro-Shimmerson-Who-gives-a-damn-about-her-name so sculpted to raw perfection! She had control and power over all of thse worthless little pawns that stood in her way!

And Ryuk should have never questioned her, because she is always right! Radiance had been around long enough to witness the Tower of Babel fall, help a certain Italian mapmaker notice the existence of America, bring peace to nations during both World Wars, use her powers to put up a sparkly impenetrable force field around the Jedi in the Clone Wars, save Sora from the Heartless that tried to consume him, shove Rukia out of the picture for an arc while Ichigo became stronger without the bitch's help, saved the world from disease by becoming a famous scientist, cured a man of Leprosy, urged Harry Potter to attend Hogwarts, defended Narnia in a bloody curb stomp kind of battle, discovered the internet, created an alternate dimension with the help of the Doctor and became such good friends with him that she got to take his time travel booth, and even invented oxygen – so please pay her a quarter every time you inhale or else she shall strike you dead!

**.**

**.**

**.**

_Nothing ever happens around here. Sigh, I want some excitement._ For what was, as a matter of fact, the seventeenth time that afternoon, Light Yagami stared out the classroom window. Evident by his personal monologue that was too complex to comprehend, he was bored with the world and wished for some excitement.

And then he quirked a brow as he noticed something black and very overly sparkly fall in a dramatic, slow motion away towards the earth. Light watched intently until it perfectly landed onto the school grounds with it's front facing upward, obviously done so that someone could easily read the letters that were written in English for some weird reason.

Which seems very weird, considering that Light was Japanese. Unless, being the very smart and dedicated student that he gloated about, he just knew a lot of different languages. And if that was the truth, then forget about this comment entirely. It does not matter.

And then, as soon as Light finished watching the black object fall in all of it's overly dramatic and sparkled glory, Near- what a minute...Near isn't in this story! Gah, okay, Light looked back at the teacher whom was telling the class about some important finals coming up. But he couldn't stop wondering about that strange object that fell and caused the storm outside to magically disappear and the sun shine beautifully down upon it and being out the sparkles radiating from it's cover. Maybe that was a little piece of heaven, but Light would just have to inspect that after class...

**.**

**.**

**.**

Just as stated previously, Light decided to inspect that mysterious object after school hours were over. He exited the building and walked across campus to where it still lie on the ground in all of it's beautifully and blindingly glittered glory. He stooped low and took a glance at the words written atop the cover.

"Death Note...?" The object was a solid black note book with the words 'DEATH NOTE' written in white and in English. But it's a miracle in disguise how the student could have possibly read that, considering the sparkles that shone around it were near blinding and were already sending a ray of light from above down to show off it's perfect form even more. "What is this...?"

Light, still stooping to the ground, shielded his eyes with one hand and used the free to grasp the notebook. That was when his fate was sealed. He grabbed it and flipped to the first page, trying to read it's rules about how it worked. "Those written in this notebook will die...? Damn it, I can't read with all this light and sparkles...what kind of a joke is this?"

"'Tis no joke, cutie~!" That voice...! It was like so...so...so angelic! So wonderfully sexy and on the most perfect levels of delicate femininity!

Light looked up, only to see another blast of light which was also sparkly shine from above as a curvy and honestly perfect female figure descended from the skies. He blinked as it faded and she was more visible, but the sparkles were still as flashy and over the top as ever. It was one of the most dramatic entrances that Light had ever seen but he shouldn't have even been impressed...yet...a sick and appalling feeling of delight welled in his chest. Yuck.

"Who...?"

"Light Yagami..." Light's brows knitted together as the figure reached the ground. For one thing, her knowledge about his name was not logical considering they didn't even know each other. Number two, this female before him could not have just gracefully floated from above and descended so perfectly, when she only had a very thin pair of glittery and soft to the touch smoky gray wings coming out of the back of her alluringly open and slitted black corset. And yes, this is a mouthful to say.

Hopefully, it will not be done again. Hmm...wishful thinking...

The wings disappeared and the female...thing walked closer to Light. She inspected him up and down before nodding approvingly and purposely leaning forward so that his ever-changing gaze would fall to her bouncy chest which could pop out of that oh so dangerously sexy, barely even there article of black clothing.

"What are you?" Light asked, a rather wonderful question to ask in this situation. And we must applaud our hero and future god for doing so, reading our minds like that! "You don't look like any girl around this school. And, to be blunt, you remind me of a prostitute I saw on a street corner once."

"Prostitutes WISH that they could look as alluring as me, Yagami." The...thing walked even closer and her hourglass figure twitched and was flaunted to perfection. Light could only freeze and stare in, well, bewilderment when Radiance intimately encircled her smooth and exotically enticing arms around his neck. "My name is Lady Radiance-Sakura-Kokoro-Shimmerson-Elizabeth-Paris-Liberty-Hottie-Desiree-Magnifience-Majesty-Grace. I am, what you may assume, the long-lost goddess of the Shinigami Realm and I keep it in balance with my power and wonderful leadership."

"Shinigami Realm?"

"Uh-huh. It's a world where Shinigami, or gods of death, live. The place is very gloomy and dark, and very boring – it is not a place that you would like to be. We, the shinigami, have notebooks much like the one you are holding right now...they're Death Notes; whoever gets their name written in them will die in whatever fashion specified, or just don't jot down the terms and it will be of a heart attack."

"Okay..."

"Whoever touches a Death Note has the godly ability to judge other people. Think of it as...a rather dark and depressing Judgment Day sort of thing. The rest of the rules are already written within the notebook and we, the Shinigami, are supposed to follow around whomever touches it and are supposed to provide advice and stuff like that. And, if think about it in a different way," Radiance smiled deviously and pulled in closer, their bodies were pressed together intimately and her glorious sparkles glittered for no reason at all but to show off her beauty. Her long and luxurious locks fluttered in the dramatic wind and Light was secretly captivated by her now ruby red eyes. She really was drop-dead sexy now that he looked over her closer, but of course, he still didn't want to bang her right there or anything because he wasn't that type of guy. Nor would he ever be. "I am yours, Light Yagami. I have been stalk-watching you from a distance and I am so in love with you, I knew that when I first laid my wonderful eyes on you that we were destined to be as one. It's honest fate that you touched my Death Note and I become a part of you."

"Does the Death Note really work that way? I could have the power to judge other people like an evil god?"

"Correct. And, I'll even toss in my willing body as a special gift." Radiance shamelessly purred, putting on the best alluring voice that she could and purposely making her eyes sparkle and rapidly dance with shades of red, blue, pink, and yellow to mingle and mix. Light, however, rubbed his chin for a moment in thought. But it was unknown if he was considering becoming a god or having this humanoid Shinigami as a sex toy like she obviously wanted to be.

"Now, forget about your godly judgment for a second. I want to be able to tell you all about myself because you're probably REALLY fascinated with me and my undeniable beauty and power, just like every other mortal usually is!"

"Not-"

Radiance drowned out Light's protest with a very beautiful giggle that made the sun shine and sparkle around the both of them, plants to spring up out of the ground and bloom, a new baby to be born to a homosexual couple, and a war somewhere in the Middle East to settle and the country guilty of starting it to surrender.

"My mom happened to be a mortal, my father was the god of the Shinigami Realm a thousand years ago. They met after this human world was about to be ending for the first time in a catastrophic situation kinda like that 2012 movie, the fell in love at first sight even though they never knew each other; because they both had always worn a beautiful red string on their fingers and their bump into each other made the thread connect as if it were made to. But due to all of the chaos breaking out all over the world, their time was limited. They QUICKLY explained their life stories and felt that it was fate for them to have met. Before my father descended to the sky to have a talk with God himself, he pressed his lips fiercely to my mother's and gave her a big damn, now or never kiss that rattled the earth and suspended the both of them in time for at least a full minute because it was that passionate and so romantic that it put Titanic, Romeo and Juliet, and The Notebook to shame. So, because of my father's powers of persuasion, he got into a deep discussion with God and won. The world didn't end at that time and everything went back into balance with the human realm returning to normal and the Shinigami realm getting rebuilt and all of the dead Shinigami returned to the barren wasteland for some stupid reason-"

"Uh...'Lady Radiance-Sakura-Kokoro-Shimmer-'"

"Your voice is very sexy, you say my name perfectly. Anyway, back to the VERY IMPORTANT AND BEAUTIFUL tale. Let's move in to where I come in, it will pull at your heart it's so powerful!" Radiance took a slim finger and delicately wiped away her sparkly tears, looking like the most beautiful and distressed young woman that Light had ever and probably would never see again. "My conception was a total accident according to my parents, they never wanted to have kids because they didn't want any dramatic conflict between either world! Mortal humans and death gods can never be together...and that Beyond Birthday dude is just an exception, alright? Anyway, they didn't want me but didn't believe in abortion unless it was done naturally so mother carried me and gave birth without any complications whatsoever. I was the most cutest and endearing child that anyone could ever hope to be blessed with...so I was half Shinigami and half human. My father also insisted that I be given about ten Death Notes, but the reason for this has not been stated and I am still eagerly waiting for the day my powers to contact his dead...spirit? So that I can ask him!"

"How much longer will this story-"

"I was cast into the human realm to fend for myself and there was...there was nobody at all to take care of poor little and impossibly adorable me! I was close to death...and then I was taken in by a very kind young woman who discovered me crying from a bleeding cut from glass in an alleyway and she decided to assume the role of my mother. She was a historian and her husband, Doctor as she wanted to be called, had this strange machine called a time travel booth. They raised me until I was thirteen, when they both fell into the pits of bankruptcy with the terrible economy. But I really learned how to fend for myself in the world then, I had positive outlooks and thoughts and new powers and wit! I used Doctor's time travel-thingy to go into Biblical times and I soothed tension and bad relations there and even helped deliver the Messiah on top of that! And I was only fourteen with no knowledge of medical stuff! Anyway, I then later went into the Dark Ages and fell in love with a guy who I had wild sex with and it turns out that he only did that because he wanted to gloat to his poor friends whom weren't all that attractive or good in bed and still had lost their virginity before him! I was so pissed off that I went into a depression; I was close to killing the guy, his friends, and even myself...but that didn't work because my good conscious was telling me it wasn't worth it. So I gradually began to eat, heal the gashes on my wrists, and discover even more awesome abilities!"

"God, it isn't ending..."

"The best parts of the story have yet to come! I used my knowledge of mechanics to improve Doctor's machine; it would then be upgraded to not only transportation to various times...but also dimensions! So in the span of only a few years: I became a famous scientist, cured a man of Leprosy, aided in the discovery of America and suggest it's name, convinced and seduced Harry Potter into attending Hogwarts, defended Narnia, saved the Jedi with a very beautifully sparkling force field, discovered oxygen, brought many couples together with the power of love, invented the internet, got myself a Keyblade and joined up with the good guys to save Sora from the Heartless that tried to consume him that one time, got Rukia out of the picture of that Ichigo would end up with Orihime like every true Bleach fan wants him to, I defeated SOPA, I was there when the Tower of Babel fell, and I have done so many more wonderful things that I am sure you want to know. Everyone wants to know about me because they love me so very much."

And it was so true. Everyone loved Radiance so very much because she was the most beautiful, talented, perfect, witty, intellectual, and strong person that has ever walked across the world and existed within time itself.

"So...why were you in this Shinigami realm?" Light wanted to hang himself for asking that question. His eyes widened and he quickly covered his mouth, utterly terrified that this...Shinigami/human thing would go off on another long and winding rant about her conflicting and unrealistic identity.

He wanted to think that he hated her and was was just annoying and overly perfect. But now that Light looked at her closer and through love goggles, he noticed that she was pretty. With her silk and honestly perfectly-placed hair and her ever-changing colorful eyes which glimmered blindingly when she laughed. And those sparkles that danced and mingled together when she made one simple movement. He wasn't the type of guy to like breasts, so he wasn't very interested on those bouncy and wild so-freaking-huge-that-no-bra-could-possibly-contain-them. So his gaze was forever fixated on her stunning light gray legs that were so long, toned, free on any horrid imperfections like hair, cuts from razors, moles, disfigurement, none of the above was present on those attention-winning limbs that could easily make any slightly chubby and/or not in shape girl burning with jealousy. Did I mention that sparkles blindingly settled along her skin as well? And rather than this being irritating...it was a major turn on for some reason?

"Oh, because my dad died and now I must take over as the ruler. It's a big pain in the ass sometimes, but I survive the tiring work because of my awesomeness."

Light glanced at his watch and then noticed that a crap ton of time had passed since he first encountered Radiance. He sighed and then held up the Death Note again, because he was far more interested in that than her life story.

"I need to make sure this is the real deal." Light told the alluring creature before him. "All I have to do is write the name of a person...and he or she will die in whatever death I chose? Even suicide?"

"That is correct, you catch on to details very rapidly just like I do!" Radiance giggled and then, when Light was caught off guard, she leaned closer and cupped his face with her hands. "Now, Mr. Judgment Day, write the name of a criminal you have heard about if you don't believe me."

It was a good thing that he randomly carried pens around with him. Light reached into his pocket and flicked the cap off a pen. After peeling Radiance's cold and soft hands from his face, he remembered the name of a criminal that he had seen on television. He wrote the name into the notebook but specified no death in particular.

"Now then," Radiance, with the snap of a finger, revealed a small little portal that defied logic which showed what was currently happening with the escaped criminal Light had chosen for the first test of judgment. "See how the bald man with the sunglasses and facial scars is parking outside that government building? Count down the seconds, Light, watch him die from a heart attack before even getting the chance to go inside and make a scene."

"How did you make that portal?"

"No time for questions! Count down the seconds with that expensive-looking watch of yours and see him get the rightful fate that impure garbage like him deserves!"

Light brought his watch closer and counted down the time. Sure enough, the criminal got of the car and immediately clutched his chest in pure agony. His brown eyes widened and his eyebrows almost hit his hairline as he noticed the dude suddenly fall over lifeless and spectators crowd around in shock at the sudden death.

"It...it worked."

"Yes, Light. It worked." The portal faded away into nothingness and Radiance grinned a sick and sadistic grin. It was obvious that she liked watching people lose their lives. Well, it's understandable. But that cannot be morally right. "This is only the beginning of our partnership – which also feels like that of a special, romantic bond between us soul mates."

"I really do have the power to kill others that don't deserve life."

"That you do. And, there's also a great deal that comes along with this power. You have me, a beautiful creature who wants nothing but to rest in your arms and love you forever~!"

"This Death Note could be very useful." Radiance huffed and continued to levitate off the ground around Light in a cloud of sparkles. In anger, her eyes were slowly shifting from a peaceful and pretty yellow to a fiery red due to him ignoring her advances and the fact a sexy woman was right here ready to commit herself to him and love him forever! No man had ever done this to her before! "Radiance, I think that this may work out. I will use this notebook to become the god of my own new safe world, filled with only important people who are good and deserve to live. They will get the chance to make it out here, everyone else will be terminated in a heartbeat if they dare screw things up. And I, I will finally have excitement in life once again!"

"And! Not! To! Mention!" Radiance shouted dramatically, being a little teasing and copying the way Light was announcing his plans. She found it attractive though, he looked kind of hot and cunning now and it was driving the hormones mad. She floated up to Light and grabbed his face, leaning in close and pressing their bodies together. "You will have me at your side as your partner. I will follow you everywhere, basically being a part of you. I want you to know that I am so in love with you that I will ensure your plans work out and no one dares to get in the way. My power will be your power alone. But the price you must pay is...us becoming one."

"You want us to have sex?"

"Well, that would be heaven for me. But, alas, that was not what I was referring to. I was actually trying to say that I want as to be forever in unity. I want us to..exchange vows as you humans call it."

"You want us to get married?" Radiance smiled approvingly, it was dazzling with the sunlight positioned on her just right as the sparkles threw a rave around her. Her ever-changing eyes began to dwell into a magical mix of forest green and violet. And her black mane flowed around her as the breeze blew just right. Light noticed all of this, before knitting his eyebrows together and looking anywhere else. "I don't think I can do that. You see, I have a reputation as the local ladies man and I must be seen with a new girlfriend daily."

"But we're made for each other. 'Tis not mere coincidence that we met and I fell under your spell. T'was a work of fate and the fact we are made for each other because we're both hot and cunning."

"I don't think so."

"You dare disagree? We really are MADE FOR EACH OTHER! I know everything about you, and now you know everything about me! I'll even let you see me stark naked and let you humiliate me in sadistic bondage acts!"

"Look, Princess," Light peeled her hands off of him, which had taken her aback so much. "You're sexy and cunning, but the most you'll ever do is help me think of a strategy to lure a person in need of violent judgment into a trap."

"You are going to love me, and you're going to love me right now!"

"I don't think so."

"LOOK INTO MY EYES AND SAY THAT...!" Radiance thundered as she shoved her face into Light's so that their eyes were mere inches apart. Light was frozen up and staring in shock as all of color scheme swirled within those orbs for a moment and then all mingled in fantastic and hypnotizing shapes. When he gazed into her eyes he saw the meaning of life and even the Promised Land. It was amazing but also very frightening.

**.**

**.**

**.**

So whatever happened to Light Yagami and Miss Perfect, Radiance? That's a legend told for generations as time goes on in South Korea-no wait...I mean...Japan? Yes, yes, Japan. Those who really knew the whole and true story and lived it where gone. Yes, because Light eventually had a showdown with some eighteen year old white-haired guy named Near whom with the help of the SPK, tracked him down and terminated him from existence. But the story is still shared by many.

Some end with Light and Radiance having both died and were reunited in hell and their so-called love was never ruined.

Some end with Light getting the chance to have his Perfect World with Radiance as his goddess he would eventually grow to return her very shallow love.

Some end with the both of them making it out alive, but breaking up. Light went to the USA and went into exile in Michigan. While Radiance developed a shallow love for Near and the both of them got married and had five kids and lived in one of the more larger cities of China-no, no, JAPAN. Why do I keep mixing that up? Well, that's how this one goes and it is more popular due to it's humorous nature.

It is not known for sure whatever happened to Light and Radiance in the end. That's because the anime and manga ended a bit differently and all plus had several scenes altered. Anyway, all that I can say is that this concludes my tale.

Oh, and who am I, you ask?

My name is Ryuk. I am a Shinigami, the one that was mentioned previously in the tale. I was told by a human I gave a Death Note to that I would get a year's worth of apples if I narrated this. Now dammit, where are those apples, Lawliet?

THE END

**.**

**.**

**.**

**I declare this: the most ridiculous and stupid piece of fanfiction I have ever written. *Cue the trumpets and drums and other encouraging instruments playing in the background for encouragement* :D**

**Just so you know: L never gave Ryuk those apples that he promised because he does not own anyway. He likes sugar, Ryuk and you have just been (I can't believe I'm about to say this in 2012 of all places) PWNED. Do you hear that strange echo in the distance? Ugh, I hate how that always happens when I use caps and hitch a ride on the last bandwagon.**

**Anyway, um, I know this is ridiculous. Please don't take this story seriously, I honestly facepalmed so many times while writing and I'm a bit embarrassed really. But since I'm hungry for attention at the moment, I decided to go through with it. Don't worry, we will never see Radiance ever again because I will never, ever, use her in a serious story.**

**Cookies for you if you caught all of the references scattered in this fic! You're awesome if you did! :)**

**Each review gives Ryuk one apple he never received for his hard work. Please R&R.**

**~MidnightSakuraBlossom**


End file.
